Wednesday, August 14, 2024 - Wedding Homily

This homily was preached for the wedding of Karen and Russell Partlow on Wednesday, August 14, 20024. The texts for this sermon were: 1 Corinthians 13:1-13 and John 15:9-12.

Our Bible talks about love, a lot. New Testament scripture talks about three kinds of love: romantic love, brotherly love, and love for humankind. When we read scripture in English we just read “love,” but the original Greek differentiates between the three kinds. Mostly, when Jesus and St. Paul speak or write about love, they are talking about that third kind of love - the love of neighbor that defines Christians - that challenging love that changes the world. But today, and every wedding, really, is a reminder that God is constantly transforming hearts and draws people closer to the divine through all sorts of kinds of love. The love between spouses is holy, too - and a key part of God acting in our world.

In the Episcopal Church, a sacrament is an outward and visible sign of inward and spiritual grace. It helps us to embrace and whole-heartedly commit outloud to what’s already true. Now, some life-long Episcopalians here might already know that holy matrimony is not technically a sacrament in the Episcopal Church because it’s not necessary for salvation - but the rite of holy matrimony is sacramental. Marriage is one of the primary ways through which many of us experience God’s heavenly, unconditional, sacrificial love.

So here’s what’s already true that we get to outwardly celebrate and make visible today. It’s already true that these two people love each other deeply - that their hearts and souls and lives are bound together. It’s already true that God has acted through your love of one another to make each of you, your families, this community, and the world, better, kinder, and more open to joy.

Karen, I admire your steadfastness and commitment to the church that raised you. Even though your work schedule has made it so hard - you’re here anyway in the middle of the week to worship and pray. It was your love that brought Russell back to church and God. And Russell, because you love this woman and because you heard and understood how important faith is to her, you said yes to spending some of those few precious hours you two have together each week to be here in our chapel. Russell, I admire how open you have been to listening and learning about God and the saints and the Episcopal flavor of the Christian faith - and that you’ve taken the time to share with me about its impact on you.

Getting to know your partnership better in the last month has been such a gift and has taught me that listening, commitment, and appreciation are the values you have made the foundation of your relationship. Russell, I’ve seen how your love calls Karen back to herself. Your words, presence, and acts of service, are a key part of how God reminds Karen that it’s all going to be okay, it really is. And Karen, your love has been a source and inspiration for Russell’s personal and spiritual growth - for him to become the man God is calling him to be.

You know, I’ve had the honor of marrying several couples at this point, but this is my first wedding between two folks who met later in life. Listening to each of you reflect on what you’ve learned about love, marriage, sacrifice and service over your lives helped me to hear those famous words from St. Paul in a new way: “When I was a child, I spoke like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child; when I became an adult, I put an end to childish ways. For now we see in a mirror, dimly, but then we will see face to face. Now I know only in part; then I will know fully, even as I have been fully known.”

This is a love between two mature people who know themselves, who’ve raised their kids, who’ve learned and loved and grown through challenge and tragedy, grief and joy. Who have lived enough of life to shed childishness and selfishness and immaturity in favor of steadfastness, openness, and grace.

When I asked you about your goals for your marriage, I was struck by your simple and wholesome hopes for this partnership: to spend your time enjoying each other’s company and to take care of each other and each other’s families. Talk about obeying Jesus’ commandment to abide in love. I can’t think of a better example of abiding in love than that. May your joy indeed be made complete.

I have to say the romantic part of me cheered when you both shared with me about how not too long ago, before you met each other, you’d both been pretty sure that another marriage wasn’t in the cards for you. You were each surprised to find that love wasn’t done with you yet, and neither was God. Your marriage, this moment, is a sign to all that love is never done with us. God is always calling us to a life filled with more: more joy, more faith, more hope, more love.

As much as you’ve embraced who each other is, both of you have each been open to being surprised and transformed by one another’s love. As Paul writes, we are all still works in progress, we all only see in part. Someday all that partialness and incompleteness will fall away, but until then when you find that person who helps you along in the journey to becoming, who lends you grace, who speaks and listens in love, you grab hold of them and give them that love right back. This is the love that transforms us: love that is patient, love that is kind. Love that endures and trusts and rejoices in truth. Thank you, Karen and Russell, for saying yes to each other, to God, to that protecting, trusting, hoping, persevering love.

In a moment Karen and Russell will make vows to each other - vows that Christians have made to one another in the presence of God for generations. But I’ll also remind everyone here today that each of us has also just made a vow, too. We’ve promised to do all in our power to uphold these two persons in their marriage. Just as God will give Karen and Russell the grace and blessing to fulfill their vows, God will also lend us the strength, courage, and wisdom to support these two in loving and caring for each other.

So Karen and Russell, as we move to the part where you make these vows, remember that you do not make them alone. God is here with you in them - and we are, too - this community and this church.